January 30, 2011 – Does an ordered life equate to CONTROL for you?? Most often I find when I am trying to teach others or execute order in my own life, it ends up being a CONTROL scene!! Why does the word orderly drive us to rigidity, and lack of spontaneity or plain and simple FUN?? I believe we need to get our priorities back in order and figure out how we can create true change with a “new look.” Since WE now KNOW with real depth that our cherubs only DO what they see us doing…we better get going on this quickly!! Have you ever been brave enough to set up a recorder in a semi-hidden place, or simply carry one along with you throughout your day?? How about a “hidden” video camera to catch you being NOT SO NICE to those around you whom you dearly LOVE?? Ok, well probably not too many of you have done this becaus it is quite ZANY…BUT there is great value in thinking about what might be captured! When we can engage our hearts, and minds with this great reflection of our own behavior, we begin to better understand that our ORDERED ways may have some fatal flaws causing our cherubs to stumble, regress, or become static in development. Do your words match what you truly believe? Is education the MOST important thing for your child to be doing today?? Do they need more speech therapy, more OT, more lessons of some sort??? Do you run here and there in the name of making them “smarter,” more capable, more successful?? WELL WHY?? What is your greatest FEAR?? TIME to reflect….WHAT do you LOVE about the folks you SPEND the most amount of time with?? Is it their BRAINS or their HEARTS??? Is it their success, or is it because they can just BE with you?? Is it their humor, or their creativity?? Whatever the reason, it is not usually the fact that they have “amazing” articulation, or perfect knowledge, or move smoothly with their bodies…..It is because you FEEL connected, and within that connectivity lies grace, acceptance, love, joy, respect, and mutual enjoyment!! YOUR cherubs need to see and feel the order in our lives based on HOW we want to BE with them not WHAT they look like, act like, sound like, or even where we want to see them next….so onward to the “new look,” it takes time, and admitting that we as parents have become too focused on the HOWS and not enough on the WHOs!! “Oh Mom and Dad….LOVE me for WHO I am…treat me with the kindness that shows me how to be kind, speak intelligently to me, so my mind can grow and immitate, BE silly so I can find peace for my silly ways, show me how to BE brave, strong and courageous when I am not sure I can, and PLEASE give me boundaries…I am just a small cherub trying to figure out how far to push and when to stop…YOU are my HEROES…I am watching YOU!!!” Love from a MOM BEING WATCHED….Hope you can see my “new look!” –DK